Lost all hope and faith, i m like a person filled with many worries. I haf given up on everything. I m a failure in everything tt i haf done, be it in relationships, games, studies or my CCA. though i haf shown marked improvement in my studies and shooting, this is still nt gd enuf... wad a failure i m. i haf totally no more faith in myself. no hope 4 me 2 win antony 2 qualify for Nationals squad. i really want 2 be inside. but how 2 shoot properly when i m troubled with so many worries. i m nt only worried abt my studies (mid yrs) or my CCA, but also by relationships. i haf 2 b the ultimate failure in relationships. though i try 2 give my best, y do i always screw up at the wrong times, now i really tink i m a failure. with this on my mind, how m i 2 put everything out and concentrate fully on my upcomin competitions like the NUS shoot or the Nationals. i m sure, if i cant put this outta my head, i will b kicked frm the team la. tt will b the ultimate blow 2 me. i dunno how i can survive my days after tt. no1 2 fall back on, no1 2 confide in. i trust no1 but myself. i m a failure, the ultimate failure. y...y...y.. i dun wan things 2 end up this way, i like her, but she definitely do not haf the same feelings for me. this will nv change no matter how i try right. somehow, in front of her, i lose everything. i cant even hold a proper conversation when i m in her presence. i really want 2 noe her better, but this is not workin out 4 me. i tink she is beggining 2 find me irritating. i tink i shall stop bothering her online or through sms. i shall jz keep 2 myself these few days, so dun blame me if i do not respond 2 u ppl. its not that i want 2 dao u all, but it is that i haf totally no mood 2 do anything. wonder whether will i play frisbee with the guyz tmr. c how. i dun even dare 2 say hi now. sob sob =(

Very depressed guy here... the song "Lonely" by Akon suits me perfectly now. I m the ultimate lonely guy. =( signing off.....