Song I'm Listening To : James Morrison - You Give Me Something
Mood : .okay.OKAY.okay.

lolx. wad a mood. im beginning 2 feel much better oredi. though once in awhile i still feel crappy. but yea... at least now im nt 24/7 crappy. lolx. tmr gonna haf off. this week shd b 1 of the fastest i'll feel in the army.

2dae... was escort to DB... a shitty feeling indeed. especially when u noe the person u r sending in. however, his positive thinking is 1 2 b admired. frm the moment we walked over 2 him, to the reading of the charge, to the cuffing, to the delivery to the MO b4 to the DB, he was all smiles and talk. if it was me, id most likely b broken down and needed 2 b dragged there. he posed totally no problems for us as we escorted him there. being the guy tt brought him all the way into the room where he was made 2 surrender all his stuff... i cld feel his positiveness dwindling down a lil. however, he dint let it show.

wednesday and thursday, gonna b chamber spec for Chemical Defence. lolx. to meng, shen and max, rmb CD? lolx. damn freakin fun right. lolx. and now i get to go into the chamber again. LOL! though this tym it will b slightly different as a spec, its still gonna b fun! i hope.
then maybe thursday night can go shaun's place 2 play soccer again. its always so fun 2 play soccer. so long never play, then saturday went down 2 shaun's place 2 play. so damn fun. lolx.

missing out on clubbing last saturday, hope can go soon. yongshen [little prince], if u wanna/can go clubbing, remember 2 jio me leh! u this kind, sure attract gal 1, then i can go join in the fun. lolx. if any1 else also going clubbing need company, jio me leh. this weekend i no duty. can go out. not clubbing, wanna go out also PLEASE jio me. lolx.

feeling much better now
thx 2 all the things happening
arnd me
and also the frenz tt haf been there

Song I'm Listening To : All Saints - Rock Steady
Mood : .DeepThought.

well... juz spent... 66 dollars on Burning Crusade. lolx. the addiction of WoW. the moment its released, i haf it installed on my com. LOLX. in fact, im installing it now as i juz got home after going out wif shaun, ton and dino. hahaz long tym no meet man dino. gotta meet up more...

umm. this saturday maybe going clubbing. any1 wanna join? wanna join drop me a sms. ive got duty this friday! lolx, then all my duties for the month of January will be over. as of the current schedule planned for February, my duties are... not on CNY! WOOHOO! lolx. but i got the 1st and last days of the month. the 1st and 28th. at least no Valentine's Day duty so hu wanna jio me go out?! hahaz! NOBODY! lolx.

and yea... shaun juz now asked me a qn. lolx. wad do i wanna buy for her... u noe... i havent been tinking abt it. got so much on my mind now. and most of it involves her. but not the buyin of something. juz... the frenship we haf... its going DOWN. LOLX!omfg im going mad. [begins digging arnd for old IMH appointment card]... [as of 12.00MN, BC HAS BEEN INSTALLED COMPLETELY SUCCESSFULLY!]... yea... so, dun ask me abt the present... i dun even tink i will get 2 meet her or talk much wif her anymore. u dunno the situation now man. nor do i noe much abt ur life now. we gotta spend less tym clubbing and more tym talkin abt out lives. lolx. 2 much tym spent in clubs means too lil tym spent in a quiet environment talking. lolx.

feel like juz remaining cold
and isolated in my own world
it'll prolly b the best choice
out of all the mistakes ive made

Song I'm Listening To : Akon Ft. Snoop Dogg - I Wanna Love You
Mood : .calm.DAZED.sian.

sianz... 2mr my weekend duty for this mth. lucky most mths will only haf like 1 weekend duty. but tt is oredi a lot. lolx. considering there arent many weekends in a mth. all the fun tt i will miss out on. the past 2 days haf been fun.

ytd, out wif Charm... nice yea. lolx. long tym no meet. went 4 dinner, walk arnd and arcade. lolx. dint noe u were into arcades too. hahaz. mre bball machines man... damn addictive ehz. u shdnt get addicted 2 it girl. lolx. its bad 4 the money.

2dae, out wif Tonia... lolx... ure mad... seriously... but yea... i still feel depressed. i can still feel it... though maybe its gettin less and less. but things are really... gettin worse. like i told u, i wanna talk 2 her... but its like gettin harder and harder.

im actually in a MSN convo wif her... but after the usual hello... theres been no replies. i shd probably juz disappear now... i cant take this... need mre alcohol 2 drown out my thoughts. my head is constantly being flooded with thoughts... i tink i shd totally stay out of people's lives and lead my own life away and isolated frm others. it juz brings shit n pain 2 me... i need 2 totally revert 2 my cold lifestyle. 1 which does not require other people in my life...

and yea, wanted 2 apply 4 my BTT 2dae... then turns out saturday got half day so i went there late and couldnt apply. prolly i shall go down on wednesday 2 apply. needa clear my BTT and ATT quick then concentrate on the practicals...

i need help
but i dunno where to look
shd prolly look within me
and stay cold on the outside

Song I'm Listening To : Justin Timberlake feat. T.I - My Love
Mood : .bored.SIAN.relieved.

havent blogged since last thursday. after some thought, maybe wad i blogged abt last thursday was out of paranoia. since talking to her after that, it really appears that it was all fear on my part. there was no need 2 tink that way as it wasnt her intention for tt 2 happen. i accept her explanations.

weekend was excellent i guess. or rather it was kinda short. slept through most of it. hahaz. saturday nite was at zouk for the hollywoodglamor inter-jc pageant. the 1 in which the JJC gal won. at least the ACJC gal won like 4 awards. she deserved em man. lolx. the pics in the website were kinda deceiving. i actually tot the SRJC gal was kinda good. i muz haf saw wrongly. the JJC 1 aint tt bad though. heh. yea... the nite was excellent... didnt really drink much cos of my current financial status with an ATM account balance of $1.95! its a record low man. the night's drinking count is 1 Vodka Lime, 1/3 Jug of more Vodka Lime and 4 Tequila shots. lolx. cld haf drank mre if i had juz mre cash. too bad im damn hard up now.

gonna begin learning driving soon i hope. after doing some research, it seems tt i muz go register for my BTT b4 anything actually happens. probably shall do it this weekend. the earlier i complete driving lessons the better. wonder hw many tries i'll take 2 pass though. considering i constantly play arcade driving, i might take like 4-5 times to pass! lolx! tt will be so darn expensive.

my 2nd guard commander duty is on wednesday. darn it. hope it rains. everytime it rains, its good news as it means there wun b any turnout.

DAMN BORED! any1 wanna jio me out next week? might oredi haf an event wif lingzhi oredi. any1 else? friday cannot cos i got duty. quick ask me out!!! POOL! BOWLING! ARCADE! SHOP! MOVIE! ANYTHINGGG! lolx.

wonder how will things carry on frm here
will it get better
or continue spiralling down
as before

Song I'm Listening To : MCR - I Don't Love You
Mood : messedup.FUCKEDUP.fucked.

i dunno wad happened. things were okay. we were talking... but all of a sudden. communication isnt there. its juz gettin real hard 4 me 2 talk 2 u. and ur nick changed. dunno if im tinking too much or wad.

m i the mr superficial ure tokin abt? did i say smth wrong in the previous convo? if so, i muz noe. but i'll most likely nt noe. 1 mre problem added 2 my list of shit in my life.

my 1st guard duty and lots mre shit flows in. m i a reservoir for shit? or a shit magnet. wtf... i needa drink. i needa drink till i 4 get everything. best if i get knocked out frm all the alcohol. this saturday would b a gd tym... Zouk here i come... some1 btr bring me home if i do get knocked out.

i needa do mre pushups. its nt helpin me 4get stuff anymore. used 2 work... maybe i needa go blow my nxt mth pay on stuff agn. it does help 2 remove thoughts frm my head 4 awhile.

things r spiraling
downhill
and i cant find the damned brakes

Song I'm Listening To : My Chemical Romance - I Don't Love You
Mood : .sad.DISAPPOINTED.tired.

well been wanting to post since after my duty which ended on 27th dec morning. wad a way 2 start my birthday, in camp. lolx. yea... thx 2 those tt sent me those birthday messages. nice 2 noe that ppl actually rmb these dates. lolx. however... i dint get a msg frm some1...

yea... anyway, internet has been kinda screwy recently... thx 2 the earthquake. but it seems 2 b shaping up oredi. gotta play WoW before the Burning Crusade comes out though... only 20k sets to be brought in first.

yea, ytd had my 2nd and last Guard2IC duty... had a bloody turnout at night... lucky it ended near the countdown... then can countdown. yea right. lolx. thx 2 those agn hu msged. lolx. enjoying celebrations outside while i was in camp ehz. lolx. and yet again, some1 dint msg. dint pick up my call either. sighz.

yep thats it. gotta meet shaun and the rest for sushi soon. its been quite some time since we actually sat down and talked. the tym at St James dint count cos it was hard 2 talk. lolx. HAPPY NEW YEAR people!


if only...
i meant a bit more
than nothing.