Song I'm Listening To : Nightmare - the WORLD
Mood : .pleased.CALM.settled.

well... i noe i blogged earlier in the day. but after tt post, ive been tinking abt all the things tt haf been happening arnd me. and ive realised that almost in every case, ive been the party in the wrong. so ive decided to apologize and hope that i can get back the life that i led in the past.

1stly... im prolly juz jealous... tt every1 arnd me is sociable while i am juz... well cold... every1 can talk amongst each other and make frenz so easily. while, im the... quiet 1... the 1 tt doesnt want to talk at all. this has been me for so long oredi. i dun tink i can even change.

2ndly... i noe i shdnt b feelin awkward shaun. ive tot abt it... so yea... i was in the wrong. i dint need 2 feel awkward... things shd b ok regarding this issue now. cya on wednesday nite at st james bro. i need u 2 b there. lolx.

3rdly... smth muz b terribly wrong with me. lolx. my settings muz b wrong. i can only attract guyz and uber young girls. lolx. wtf is wrong man.

4thly... i gotta control my money flow. less taxi rides frm now on. even if im gonna b late i prolly shd take bus/train still. lolx... if nt no money. this mth alone, ive loaned 200 dollars frm my mum and its oredi gone... so long mre till payday. how m i 2 survive. cant even get my drinks... (BREWERKS has nice beer)

so yea, sorry 2 every1 arnd me... ive been at fault and nt realise. nt only tt, but i also scolded many of u guyz and yet u all still stayed ok. my apologies. hopefully, everything will return 2 wad it was in the past. though i'll probably still be the cold Jerold that most of u noe.

i'll nv be a outspoken guy
no matter wad ive gone through
the cold personality still suits me
even though it brings me lil frenz

Song I'm Listening To : Noises frm the television set
Mood : .messedup.MESSEDUP.severelymessedup.

its christmas today, and i still havent sorted out all the shit in my head... all those xmas wishes thing... they nv eva come true do they... if only they do... my wish every year is roughly similar and yet it never comes true. is it really impossible?

sry shaun, tonia, charm... ytd, really felt... in a mess... cldnt help it. dun ask me y... in fact, im still in a mess now... hopefully this will all settle down soon. i dont mean to look sian all the time... it spoils the atmosphere for u guyz... maybe i'll stay home till i sort this out...

anyway, every1 enjoy yer xmas yea... ive got duty tmr. then woohoo... the day has come. wonder wad will happen. awaiting the dinner frm her! lolx. shd i get a gift? lolx. bah. i dunno. lolx.

been drinkin beer abit mre now... last tym i dun even like beer man. only drank vodka products... but now, everytym nite tym go out, muz buy 1 bottle of beer. lolx. weird. wednesday... St James Power Station. who wants 2 go? tell me or shaun quick... the mre the merrier. its Ladies Nite and for guyz, its $15 entry with 2 free drinks... ownage... drinks will b on me! rmb! sms/call/msn me if u wanna go

i dunno y i tink tt way
shd i heed advice
and stay clear totally

Song I'm Listening To : JUNE - Baby It's You
Mood : .stoned.STRESSED.sad.

hmm... this song is nice man... current ending song of Bleach which has finally concluded the Bounto segment i hope.

well, going sentosa in like a few hrs time... shaun pang seh lor. lolx. i tot u going. but nevermind, shd b got enuf ppl 2 njoy bah. nw gotta hope tt the weather is good if nt all the activities will b ruined lor. ask max wads the wet weather program, he say still go sentosa. wonder wad we can do over there when its raining. hehz.

2dae went on mad shoppin sia... got myself a new wallet (to replace the old 1 with a hole at the coin compartment), tshirts, shorts, shoes and socks. lolx. plus the bag i bought recently, man, ive got almost all the things that i wanted. lolx. now left the mre useless stuff. like the notebook similar to the Deathnote that the stall in Cineleisure sells. also wanna catch some movies. like Deathnote2 and Curse of the Golden Flower. man... looks good. but gotta find time and people to watch it with.

went clubbing last night at MOS. man, my 1st tym in there after my attempt to enter on the MILKSHAKE night failed horribly. lolx. its kinda a nice place and the SIM-UOL pageant was there. hmm... tink i saw shaun's fren as a contestant there. dunno if i saw wrongly. went there and had my free drink b4 leaving MOS with my officer to go 7-11 to buy beer. downed a bottle of carona quickly b4 re-entering MOS and into the dance floor. tts where i met Joanne. lolx. long tym no c... but b4 long, lost her agn. lolx. didnt haf much 2 drink through the night though. at 2-3am there was 1for1 so me n my officer went to try the Red Ice thingy... kinda weird. tastes alot like juice. lolx. but the red blinking light is kinda attractive.

on the 27th prolly gonna club again. saw an advertisement sayin tt wednesdays at St. James Power Station is like ladies night, and for guys its $15 entry with 2 drinks. lolx. tts a pretty good offer man. lolx. or maybe i shd go Zouk or juz stay home and relax with my computer. lolx.

things arent going that smoothly in my life
i tot things would b btr after i made myself clear
but mre things haf been coming in
how m i 2 clear my life

Song I'm Listening To : Nightmare - the WORLD
Mood : .stressed.STRESSED.stressed.

bah... i dunno y m i feeling so stressed
its like everything/every1 arnd me has a bone 2 pick with me
i get severely irritated very easily recently
and Devin aint helping much
abit mre n i'll make sure he's going DB

tmr half day leave
2nd half of the day gotta figure out wad 2 get for tt gift xchange thing
i dun haf the habit of gettin gifts for others
so suggestions please come in
details of gathering is:
a gathering for army guyz
budget - $20

tmr night prolly go clubbing
might b a gd place 4 me 2 get rid of all the stress
prolly drink till i puke then go home or smth
but no sim 2 help me get home in tt case. lolx

weather recently has been a bitch
hopefully it'll all clear up by saturday
then the gathering at sentosa can still carry on
due to the rain
the meeting of me, kenneth, mathew and jess
ended up being juz a meetin of me and kenneth
mathew's path to town was apparently a flooded mess
well, i'll believe u frm the pix ive seen

birthdays and gift-related occasions
wads the pt of gifts
pls dun give me anything
not like many ppl r gonna rmb
the date which is comin
the date when i return frm my 1st duty
the date which was never significant

im so darn stressed
but i dunno y
how m i 2 solve
when i cant find the cause

Song I'm Listening To : YUI - Rolling Star
Mood : .spendthrift.HAPPY.drenched.

well... just saw the MV for Rolling Star by YUI [current starting song of Bleach]. wow, if i nv saw the MV, i would never noe that the singer is so darn pretty. lolx. but im also lookin 4 other songs. the WORLD by Nightmare is a nice song too. its the title song of the Death Note anime series.

ive also gotten the answer frm u... im happy yet sad at the same time but i'll make sure not to show the sad side to any1 outside. staying cheerful is good. hehz. happy that u like me as a fren. but yet sad that.... oh nvm. LOLX

another day of duty tmr b4 half a day on thursday then LEAVE! woot. then come back on the 26th for duty. my 1st ever guard2IC duty. tokin abt guard2, today BSO lt Ho came and ask me if january i wanna do guard2 or guardcom. lolx. i say anything then he kaobei me ask me choose 1. being a spec, i tot it would b weird if i said i wanna b guard2, so i garang garang say i wanna b guardcom. die liao lor. lolx.

saturday maybe going sentosa wif max, mengfei, chewyi and the rest for ASLC frenx gathering... haha hope shaun can go too... then we can go swim and canoe like wad we haf been waitin for so long. gotta get a gathering for dino and russ too. sushi again! hahaz!

well... though the answer is out
im hoping things will change
i still tink ive got a chance
juz whether... it will work out
in the right way

Song I'm Listening To : My Chemical Romance - I Don't Love You
Mood : .Sian.WOW-ed.HAPPY.

weee... MCR's latest album "The Black Parade" really is good. many good songs inside including "Welcome to the Black Parade", "House of Wolves", "Mama" and many mre like the one im listenin to at this moment.

well, the past few days has been rather sian for me when im home as my family is in korea enjoying their holiday (or maybe not... heard they encountered some problems there. sob). alone at home has its pros and cons. pros being i haf the whole place 2 myself and can throw all my stuff everywhere being the messy person i am. i'll probably gotta tidy up the place b4 they return on Saturday night (WEE! THEY R COMIN BACK!). without my bro, WoW has lost quite a bit of its charm. but nevertheless, ive still played quite a bit of it over the past few days. haf also been out wif my "sis" (thx 4 havin dinner man... felt real sian at hm) and also with shaun, tonia and derrick today. (sry guyz 4 entering stoning mode halfway... was tinking abt stuff)

if not 4 em, my life would really be sian during my 1st period of leave since leaving SISPEC. tmr i'll be having my understudy for Guard2IC. at first i thought tt i would haf 2 stay in but now Yong Chuen said i might not need to... depending on BSO. oh yea, speakin of BSO, i went clubbing with my officer man. but tt night was real screwed...

at 1st, me and shaun had the intention of going to MOS for tt free thing... wad MILKSHAKE ah... end up, the queue was till Novotel hotel... wad a fuckin long queue. after quite a long wait, we decided to leave for Dbl O with my officer.... but it was full hse. we then headed to Butter Factory. but it was only open to members. thus we ended ourselves up at Coccolatte. wad a coincidence it was then that we met shaun, jue, nic and a whole lot of other people there. shaun wong got himself into some bad shape and the day ended with me and sim sending wong home. lolx.

"U 2 r like tgt but nt tgt"
i still dun really understand... but... i dun tink its possible u c... its mre like... "u 2 r nt tgt"... i dun c the tgt part. it juz doesnt look like its gonna happen... yea, she's a nice gal... but... ...

if only what u said is true to a certain extent
just the starting part
that would make my day
on tt special day

Song I'm Listening To : Chamillionaire ft. Krayzie Bone - Ridin' Dirty
Mood : .MaxedOutOnBOREDOM.

well.. been quite some time since ive blogged. if im nt wrong, since the last tym, ive oredi changed my com as my previous com broke down on me causing me to lose quite a bit of stuff including my whole Air Gear anime series. damned them. i tink i shd go redownload the series. missing the series oredi.

firstly, things at camp have been going pretty smoothly. gotten 2 noe my men better and can now talk 2 some of them at ease. even the commanders and my fellow sergeants have been understanding and helping me to adapt to my new surroundings. however, ive oredi been thrown into my schedule. with my first 2 Guard2IC duties coming up on important dates, i really wonder how my schedule will be like with my Guard Commander duties. ive got duty on the 26th (1 day after xmas and also 1 day b4 m bdae) and then theres also the 31st (New Years Eve!). looks like i'll be counting down in camp this year. zzz.

2ndly... friendship... looks like things have gotten better. u shd noe, im nt avoiding u.

and WoW! lolx. the game that has grabbed my attention like mad. playing it everyday since ive got a 8to5 job now... muz chiong lvl to reach my desired lvl 60 before the XPAC comes out. lolx.

next week, ive got leave from the 11th to 14th. so, jio me out if u all wanna play pool or catch a movie or juz meet up 2 chat. other than tt, ive also got leave on the 21st and 22nd. followed by 28th and 29th. these r the dates 2 note if u all want 2 meet up. DEATH NOTE 2 OPENS ON 28TH! WEEE!

i seriously am not avoiding u
im juz naturally closed